Someone has just explained their idea, feeling, or opinion to me. I might be inclined to think I understand, but I realize that I don’t know what I don’t know: I don’t get to decide whether I understand someone else’s thoughts and feelings— they do.

So, I summarize. E.g.: “Let me see if I’m getting this right, you think/feel XXX, because YYY… Is that it?”

I try to reduce the number of assumptions I make. I look for feelings of uncertainty, and ask about them. I scan my attention over the ideas and see where my mind lingers unusually.

2022-03-05 thought: Can I think of a better title for this essay?

2022-03-19 thought: Is this technique too object-level? Are ‘techniques’ even helpful at all?